There are days that are okay, when I can be happy and grateful.
There are days when I'm ambivalent, when I'm too tired to feel much of anything.
And there are days that are so impossibly hard - when I start to realize how far along I would have been with the first pregnancy if things had been different; when I feel so discouraged about my work and the prospect of future employment; when I feel overwhelmed by anger, and fear, and sadness; when I can't see how any of this will ever right itself; and when I blame myself for every. piece. of. this. pain.
I really loved Lynne's advice a while back to "do something nice for yourself everyday." But I'm realizing I'm not very creative when it comes to self-care and on the second and third types of days, these ideas are especially hard to muster. So here's one way I could use your help - What are some ways you "treat" yourself. I would especially love ideas that are not high in sugar or cash and which might facilitate a positive work environment. Thoughts?
this thankful week
9 months ago
6 comments:
I am new to your blog. I have read the past enteries and can't get past a comment you made in the past... "EVERYTHING WILL BE OK IN THE END. IF IT'S NOT OK, IT'S NOT THE END." You need to hang on to that.
Great blog have enjoyed reading it.
Hot baths. Yoga. Fall walks. Gelato (a lot of my self-care involves sugar, alas). Watching "America's Next Top Model." Making a cup of tea. Hanging out with friends. Fancy chocolate bars from the co-op. Playing with cats. Seeing what is on the sale rack at The Soap Opera, and buying something that smells good.
I "allow" myself to re-read parts of my favorite books--a lot of the time, I tell myself, "I'll do that when I'm done with work," and then never get to it. But if I take 15 minutes or so with a favorite, it often works to refocus me and cheer me up. Other treats: yardwork (believe it or not, but it's exercise, sun, fresh air, and a feeling of accomplishment, even after just half an hour); change a doll's outfit; change up table linens; look at favorite photos; light a candle; take a really hot shower or bath; paint my toenails; put out a call online for "links that will make me smile". The last works because I have amazing friends who do respond, and just the fact of their response helps immensely, and also because baby otters make everything better. (Proof is here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GhuvaKLJbNw)
1. Buying flowers for yourself once a week so things look pretty and cheery (My grocery store sells flowers for $5 -- so no big expense).
2. Painted toes
3. Watching What Not to Wear or Say Yes to the Dress for a lunch break.
4. Burning a candle while you work so things smell good
5. Christmas tree/lights!!
6. Calling your friend Stacy for a pep talk and funny stories/jokes from Charlie and Martha.
Singing in the shower. Hot tea. Some sort of hands on project (a craft, music, cooking, gardening). Walks are great (It's harder in the winter, but maybe go window shopping somewhere indoors.) Writing something with magnetic poetry, preferably something silly.
When I was a kid, I was the only girl, and had 4 younger brothers. When my mom and I had had our testosterone fill, we would engage in our form of "retail therapy," which we called "goin' bummin'." For example, you hit the makeup counter and paint every fingernail with a wild color you would never usually wear...or even every finger a different color. Go try on the ridiculous (or ridiculously expensive) sequined red dress in the window. Try on hats, jewelry, whatever catches your eye. Go to a store you've never been in before.
Here's the trick, though: you can buy ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!
It was a truly liberating experience, pretending we had all the money in the world to look at anything we wanted, and something we still call each other to do when husbands get to be too, too much. Grab a good friend and give it a try!
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