Gratitude

On this day when we are to look back on the past year and express our gratitude, I am at a loss for words. Mostly, I feel an overwhelming urge to weep. The dust has begun to settle on our new life. It is slowly become clear that we will survive 2011, but as I survey the year I feel a jumble of things - joy, survivor's guilt, graditude, love, and just plain exhaustion.

We have been lucky this year. So, so lucky. There have been a couple incidents lately that have reminded me how easily the outcomes could have been different.We are very blessed.

So here's the short list of the things I am grateful for:

• Our cozy new home and the food on our table
• Our health insurance
• A job that I absolutely love and colleagues and students who have made me feel so at home in this new place
• Our friends and family who saw us through this past year
• Sweet, loyal Sully who has kindly put up with all these changes to his universe this year - just so long as he is with us
• My husband - There is so much to say about him, but perhaps I'll just say this: I came home one day this week to a pot of afternoon coffee, a roaring fire, and a happy, snuggly baby with his Dad's heart-wrenching brown eyes. It doesn't get much better than that.
• Julian - really there are no words for how much I love you, Buddy